Fighting with the Sky

On Being Out of Someone's League

Posted on: March 5, 2010

I keep seeing trailers for the new movie She’s Out of My League (which can be viewed here).  Movies like this really irritate me.  Women can date someone who is less attractive than them and it’s because he’s a “nice guy.”  But guys never date (in movies/tv) a woman who is less attractive than them.  And if they do, they try to make them over so that they are more attractive (I am thinking She’s All That type movies).  Even in movies where a man is deemed to be “slumming it” and dating someone “below his standing” (as in movies where a rich man dates a poor woman), the woman is still very attractive.

This trend is evident in looking at popular actors and actresses as well.  Male actors who are less attractive can get by with being funny or a good dramatic actor.  But there are few examples (yes, there are some, but not many) of female actors who is not physically attractive but is still popular because she is an amazing actress.

This doesn’t really leave a lot of hope for real life.  In real life, it’s not questioned as much when an attractive woman dates someone less attractive, because that guy must be a “nice guy” and “treat her right.”  But a man who dates someone who is less attractive than him is almost always questioned by friends, coworkers, even family.  How can an attractive man date someone who looks like that?  She must be good in bed…

*Note: in this post I am mainly talking about heterosexual relationships.  I know that that is not necessarily fair of me.  But the trend that I see in movies and tv usually tends to deal with heterosexual relationships.  And this probably has to do with the limited number of homosexual relationships that are accurately portrayed in pop culture.  And I am talking about heterosexual relationships because those are the kinds of relationships that I am most familiar with personally, both in my experience and experiences of friends.

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2 Responses to "On Being Out of Someone's League"

You are right in noticing this annoying trend in movies and television. Real life, however, bears no relation to what Hollywood tries to portray as true. People fall in love for all kinds of reasons and romantic personal tastes differ widely. Friends and relatives always have a tendency to believe that nobody is good enough for their loved one, irrespective of their gender. So the “Ohmigod, what does s/he find in him/her” conversations surround both male and female romantic choices.

I know that not everyone’s experiences are the same, but I was just mainly thinking of my experiences and the experiences of my friends. And I do think that Hollywood has some sort of influence on life in this way, even if it isn’t a lot.

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